Love, attention and the intentionality.

No one can pour into you what you refuse to pour into yourself.

A few weeks ago, I saw a post on TikTok, it was a picture of a man standing and then a caption above his head that read:

"200 reasons why I love her and one reason I had to leave.”

He went ahead to list the 200 reasons and there I was with my phone, blushing as if I were the one receiving this big gesture of love.

I was gobsmacked. The butterflies in my stomach were in full flight, making it impossible for my brain to take in all 200 reasons. All I could think about was:

"Is this straight out of a movie or book?"

But no. This was REAL.

I rushed to the comment section and I noticed that many people were as excited as I was. People were raving and blushing— wishing they were the one. I realized that many were like me, who didn’t take the time to read all the reasons but were just happy by the intentionality behind it.

But one comment stopped me in my tracks:

“I can’t even think of 200 things I love about myself."

I was sincerely taken aback.

We constantly talk about how much we deserve love, how much we want big gestures, yet we rarely take our time to give ourselves that same love.

If you were asked to list out 200 reasons you love yourself, can you do that? It sounds overwhelming, right? But should it be?

It's funny how millions of people (like me) blushed at the 200 reasons but barely have the time to read them.

That says a lot.

Everyone wants big love gestures.

Everyone wants to feel important to another.

Everyone wants to be at the receiving end of an intentional love.

But…

Everyone is busy.

Too busy to love themselves.

Too busy to give the kind of love they seek.

Too busy to recognize why they deserve love.

Does this make any sense to you?

Before you crave love and attention from someone else, try giving yourself even the tiniest dose of attention.

What do you actually like?

What are your pet peeves?

Are you among those that let people form their image for them?

“This person says I’m funny. So, yes, I’m funny."

Give yourself 200 reasons you love yourself. If that sounds overwhelming, start with one. Then another. And another. And watch yourself slowly get to the top.

My mother would always said, "You don’t have to wait for someone to take you out; take yourself on a date.”

Yes, do it.

Go on solo dates. That's therapeutic and freeing— a date without obligations to please anyone but yourself.

Be intentional about yourself.

Buy gifts for yourself.

Put Flowers by Miley Cyrus and sing it at the top of your voice.

Be kind to yourself.

Start journaling.

Why would you suck because you had no one to spend Valentine with? You should have sucked up that feeling and have the best valentine ever.

No pressure.

The love you think you deserve starts with you. No one can give you what you can’t give yourself.