Newsflash: It’s here again

On comparison

You wake up with this feeling seeping through your heart, making you smile at even the blandest joke. As you shower, you sing that song in the most awful voice, but you don’t care about the voice, you just feel happy and unbothered.

But then, you pick up your phone, and everything starts going south. You no longer feel positive about life; the sweet taste of life suddenly turns sour.

Photo by Adrian Swancar on Unsplash

Though you try to talk yourself out of the heart-wrenching thoughts, your mind is deaf to reason, drifting to them. You suddenly feel like the worst person in the world, like a child whose favourite toy has been forcibly taken from. You hate this feeling, but you can’t help it.

Comparison.

Slices of envy.

Chunks of self-pity.

Bites of insecurity.

A long time ago, people only got this feeling when they left their house or during a conversation about someone. But thanks to social media, where everyone’s business is now yours, whether you are an introvert or extrovert, you are now exposed to everything and that feeling has become too familiar.

The things you have seen on social media have drastically made the big achievements in your life look insignificant, not enough, and even worthless.

How can I be happy to start my first book when this person has already published two?

How can I be happy that I have this when this person has more than this?

How can I be proud of this stage in my life when my peers moved past it years ago?

How can I be content about getting 2 likes on my post when others are having 243 likes?

You left this tiny voice win, and your achievements become a mere joke. It's not worth the hype, you think. You keep telling yourself that you just need to wait until you get to THAT level, THAT point, till you become THAT person.

In a time when life has curated a certain level as ‘success’ and everything else as mediocre, you need to brace yourself for this feeling because it will never go away. The only solution is to create your own goals so that the world’s standard will never belittle your happiness.

Allow me to speak plainly, it's so easy to see someone better than you, someone that you think is living the life you want but haven't achieved yet. But remember, everyone is fighting their own battles and running their own race, each with different starting and ending points. So why compare yourself to people who are running different races from yours? Have you ever seen a competition where a relay race and marathon take place simultaneously? Don't do that. It will only make your small wins look insignificant, like toys in an adult’s eyes—worthless and easily replaceable. Comparing yourself to someone who has gotten to the top of the success ladder will not solve one-third of your problems, instead, it will magnify them, giving them a golden seat to grow and multiply.

Yes, competition can bring out the best in you, you’d be amazed at what you can achieve when you are in a competition. But, competition with someone will take you not-so-far in life because it is often accompanied by feelings of comparison, envy, self-pity, and insecurity. You don't need to compete with anyone to get to the top. Singing Cardi B's lyrics might be the best advice here:

“I'm my own competition, I'm competing with myself.”

If there's anyone that you should challenge on your journey to the top, it is yourself. So don't let people's posts on social media diminish your success. Everyone is working with their own timeline.